The Arizona Desert Lamp

Eggward Noggyhands: Your New Favorite College Christmas Pastime

Posted in Culture, Random by Connor Mendenhall on 16 December 2008

NoggyhandsAs Evan has noted elsewhere, “college parties are weak” come Christmastime. Though “Halloween inspires the most creative of prostituted fashions, the best Christmas party that iterates itself is the ‘Tacky Sweater Party’—ironic, yes, but hardly damning.”

Hardly surprising, either. Towards the end of the semester, students are too focused on finals and family and chestnuts roasting on an open fire to bother party planning. But I intend to cure the December doldrums, with a simple seasonal variation on a college favorite that combines youthful decadence with Yuletide cheer: Eggward Noggyhands.

To play Eggward Noggyhands, you’ll need two 32 oz. cartons of eggnog for each player, a roll of duct tape, and an iron will, because you’re going to be guzzling about 2,700 calories of holiday joy. Rules are simple: if you remove your nog before both cartons are empty, you lose. If you’re the first to finish both, then well…you’ll probably be the first actual winner of Eggward Noggyhands in the history of the world.

Best of all, it’s fun for the whole family. A few ounces of bourbon aren’t exactly the principal factor in a Noggyhands victory, so feel free to play with both leaded and unleaded eggnog—which means Grandma, your little sister, and all the brothers from the Delta Kappa house can come together and nog by the fire.

If you’re seriously considering a round of Eggward Noggyhands, remember that it’s best to see a doctor before beginning any holiday drinking game regimen. And if you’re seriously considering it, I suggest this recipe from Alton Brown. Merry nogging!

(photo via flickr user booleansplit)

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3 Responses

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  1. […] no noggy-hands-induced games of Diplomacy? At least they can still play a good round of slap-the-1999-Pinot-Noir. […]

  2. Evan Lisull said, on 19 December 2008 at 10:03 am

    Also, this seems appropriate: http://culture11.com/article/34108.

    Finals week just got 230% more perilous.

  3. […] Eggward Noggyhands, a game both elegant and challenging by virtue of its simplicity, Battleshots is complex by design. […]


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